How to Advocate for Yourself at Work as a Woman was originally published on Fairygodboss.
Do you ever find yourself hesitating to speak up at work? Maybe you’ve thought, “I’ll just let my boss notice my hard work,” or “I don’t want to seem pushy.”
Many women feel this way, and it’s not surprising—self-advocacy can feel uncomfortable, especially in workplaces that still carry unspoken biases. But here’s the truth: Advocating for yourself is crucial for career growth, especially as a woman.
It’s time to step up and learn how to advocate for yourself at work. We’ll break down why and how step by step, so that it feels easier and more natural from now on.
What does it mean to advocate for yourself?
Let’s start with the basics: What does advocating for yourself mean? It’s when you actively take steps to make your needs, accomplishments, and ambitions known.
“The best thing you can do is come into every situation knowing that having others advocate for you is the exception, not the rule,” says career coach Kaila Kea-Lewis. “You must fully expect that you are the only person who will advocate for you—and actively seek the tools to do that.”
This doesn’t mean being boastful or self-centered; it’s about standing in your worth and confidently communicating your value. Think of advocating for yourself as having your own back.
Advocating for yourself at work is just as important as working hard
Why is it important to advocate for yourself? While workplaces are indeed improving, biases are still around. This 2022 study from MIT Sloan associate professor Danielle Li shows that female employees are 14% less likely to be promoted than their male colleagues, despite outperforming them and being less likely to quit. The findings show that women receive higher performance ratings, but 8.3% lower ratings for potential than men.
Have you ever seen more potential where there’s less performance? Neither have we. In environments where the odds are stacked against you, advocating for yourself isn’t just important—it’s necessary.
Plus, you’re also breaking down barriers for the women who come after you. “In many cases, you’re coming into a situation where there are preconceived notions about who you are,” Kea-Lewis says. “So it’s important to advocate for yourself—not to prove anything, but to ensure you have a voice in situations that matter to you.”
Why is advocating for yourself so hard?
You might understand the importance of advocating for yourself at work, but putting it into practice is not that simple. We get it. Many of us have blockers that make it feel daunting, like:
- Fear of being seen as difficult: Women are often socialized to prioritize likability, which can make assertiveness feel risky.
- Imposter syndrome: It’s easy to downplay your contributions with phrases like, “I didn’t really do much,” even when you played a key role in a project’s success.
- Uncertainty about how to start: Without clear examples or role models, self-advocacy can feel like uncharted territory.
But here’s the good news: These challenges are here to be faced. We asked Kea-Lewis for her best advice on how to advocate for yourself at work.
How to advocate for yourself at work as a woman
Advocating for yourself doesn’t happen overnight, but with practice, it gets easier. Here’s how to start, backed up by a career expert:
1. Acknowledge your value
Let’s get one thing clear right away: You are capable and deserving. Know that, and then keep a running list of your individual accomplishments—projects you’ve led, problems you’ve solved, or praise you’ve received. Use this as a reminder of your worth and a tool to back up your self-advocacy.
“Maybe you didn’t lead the project, but you played a role that helped make it successful,” Kea-Lewis says. “Own that and make it clear when you’re job searching, networking, or pursuing anything that feels scary.”
2. Set boundaries and expectations
Don’t wait for someone to ask how you work best—share it proactively. “In my intro to a new team, I mentioned that I work best when I have 24 hours to review requests,” Kea-Lewis says. “It set the tone early and helped me avoid unnecessary stress.” Setting boundaries isn’t selfish; it’s about creating a work environment where you can thrive.
3. Start small and build confidence
If the idea of asking for a promotion feels overwhelming, start with smaller acts of self-advocacy. Each small win will boost your confidence and prepare you for bigger conversations. For example:
- Speak up in meetings. Share your ideas or offer a solution to a problem.
- Volunteer for a project that aligns with your goals.
- Request feedback to understand how your contributions are perceived.
4. Be clear and direct
Clarity is key to advocating for yourself. It might feel uncomfortable at first, but the more you practice, the easier it becomes. Instead of hinting at what you want, spell it out. For example, when asking for a raise, explain:
- What you’ve accomplished
- How it’s impacted the team or company
- What you’re asking for and why it’s justified
This might help:How to Ask for a Raise: A Step-by-Step Guide with Expert Tips
5. Be patient and persistent
Change takes time, especially if you’re unlearning patterns of passivity. Give yourself grace as you navigate this journey. “It’s OK if you don’t get it right in the beginning,” Kea-Lewis says. “Advocate for yourself in small, day-to-day interactions, and build your way up to bigger opportunities like salary negotiations.”
Advocate for yourself: Examples for different situations
Still not sure how advocating for yourself looks in action? Here are a few examples:
#1: How to advocate for yourself at work for a promotion
Over the past year, I’ve taken on additional responsibilities and consistently delivered results. I’d like to discuss a potential promotion to reflect my growth.
#2: How to advocate for recognition at work
I’m proud of the role I played in the XYZ project and wanted to ensure my contributions are acknowledged.
#3: How to advocate for the support you need
I need additional resources to meet the deadlines for this project. Can we allocate more time or assign extra help?
Start today
Advocating for yourself is a skill, not a one-time event. It requires self-awareness, practice, and a willingness to embrace discomfort. But with time, you’ll find that standing up for your needs not only benefits your career—it also empowers others to do the same. So, start today. Your voice matters, and it’s time the world heard it.
FAQs
What is self-advocacy at work?
Self-advocacy means confidently communicating your needs, goals, and achievements to ensure they’re recognized and addressed.
How can we advocate for ourselves and others in the workplace?
Advocate for yourself by speaking up about your own needs and goals, and support others by amplifying their voices in meetings or mentoring them.
What is an example of advocacy in the workplace?
Advocacy can be as simple as asking for more responsibility to develop a skill or as bold as negotiating a higher salary.
How can I practice self-advocacy?
Begin with small steps, like expressing your preferences in meetings, and gradually work toward bigger goals like promotions or raises.
How do I ask my boss to advocate for me?
Start by expressing your goals and asking for their support. Be clear about what you need—a mentorship, introductions, or a recommendation. A good starting point might be: “I’d like to grow into [specific role/goal], and I’d appreciate your advice on how I can get there.”
